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THE TRIUMPH OF A LOST SOUL December 26, 2008

Posted by arun in Philosophy, happenings, life, personal, thoughts.
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Slept thro’ the days and wept thro’ the nights,

Sought wisdom from a few undefeated knights,

Leaped thro’ many dreams, did you hear the screams?

Wasn’t aware I’d get caught in one

Turned out to be the worst nightmare!

If you’d ask now, I couldn’t care,

But it was insane; allow me to explain.


So consumed by cherubic innocence and beauty,

Lost my profundity,

With the world suddenly becoming two dimensional,

Failed to realize that suffering was optional,

Her feelings were never real but virtual,

Spite of the grotesque gorgeousness,

Blinded with the thought of grasping divine,

I decided to trade a valuable station,

Immaturity for sublime!

Only to bring me down,

I caved and dug my own grave.


Sanctity of my life got trivialized,

Think of it, I realized,

I lived with no color but gray of all shades,

Only to haunt me till my memory fades.


In the cobbled streets of my mind braided with topiaries,

I tried to savor those paltry moments,

Compassion with superfluous narcissism,

With the slightest of compunction,

but a subtle conciliatory tone of guilt,

Fear, tears and self-loathing on an infinite loop

Where the message never got through,

The melodrama seemed so magical

aha, how illogical?

A confused xeric soul in distress,

I can only wish and bless.


I wasn’t sure before,

But now I know; I will never obtain closure.


I snapped out of the dream, within a dream?

A blaze of light with a conjuring voice embraced me,

“I came to save you, your disheartened soul”, she said as I smelt her gleaming aura,

“Will you stay to heal me?” I asked,

What do you think? She replied.

THE QUAGMIRE OF ENTANGLED CHOICES February 12, 2008

Posted by arun in Philosophy, life, personal, thoughts.
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4 comments

During one of those meaningless pondering moments, it came to my mind, “Don’t do the crime if you can’t do the time” which off late goes by the saying “Karma is a bitch”. However, if you think about, it masquerades in the form of “choice”. Each and every stage in everyone’s life is governed by choice. It goes by another menacing term which scientists often use, usually when they don’t know what the hell they are talking about or couldn’t corroborate their facts: “Probability”. Choice embraces you tightly, masking you under the percept of “hope”, but with ingratiating smile and unctuous desires to bite you in the ass. Unfortunately, we all realize only after it happens. We can’t always make it right.

I can not help but wonder at my ignorance over these years. I have always bitched over the fact that my parents have been over-protective. They have and are guiding me through every stage of my life, with their dreams of seeing me as a member of the erudite community. Now, this is karma’s second messenger “expectation” :) . But, when I look back now, I understand they had to be over-protective because they knew, I wasn’t ready to play gambling with choices. I was only gloating with pride because everything was happening my way. It took me a while, a period of 20+ years to gain some perspective. But enough about me.

My concerns are truly about the next generation. I don’t know whether to call this ignorance or frustration. You might remember the incident that happened December of last year in India, where an 8th standard kid shot his classmate because he was the hector (bully) of his class!! He made a faltering decision that potentially alters his life for ever. He foundered utterly in controlling his emotions, his rage overpowered him! These incidents are starting to happen more than ever in India. It seriously troubles me, I can’t even imagine the plight if this trend were to continue. The attitude of one to handle tirades or bully appropriately through proper channels, if not concluded with a descent conversation, would have been the best choice for everyone. Taking drastic measures over a tenuous argument or a couple of school-fights, as in this case, puts every one in state of misery! The kid says “I did nothing wrong, he deserved this!” How more vindictive can it get? I feel as if the endurance limit is dwindling…:(

The important thing to realize is, you shouldn’t be afraid of making choices. You simply can’t be afraid. Instead, you have to choose wisely always. Its an ever lasting battle. For example, if Aishwarya Rai hadn’t reneged on a proffer to act in a Bond movie, I would have stopped watching Bond movies. I feel she would be an ersatz replacement. She just isn’t Bond material, in spite of her poignant looks. Good choice Ash. ha ha.

As I started, the number of things I wanted to write about kept on piling up and I couldn’t organize or keep it related enough. I didn’t want to get all philosophical in conveying my concerns, rather, to keep it as terse as possible. I felt the topic was quite heavy, therefore ending with a silly dry humor. But then, hey, these are my “ramblings” aren’t they! ;)

A VACILLANT YET IRREFUTABLE DISCUSSION December 22, 2007

Posted by arun in Philosophy, life, personal, thoughts.
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Couple days back, a friend of mine gave me a link to a talk by Richard Dawkins, a well known ethologist, evolutionary biologist and the author of the book “The God Delusion”. I found his talk extremely amusing, in particular the limpid style of argument. I consider myself to be a (relatively-ok) deipnosophist, at least an observation made by some from the heated discussions I have had so far. Over the multitude of discussions I have had, I have come to know it’s essential to have patience and open state of mind to other’s thoughts and arguments. I am not even remotely related to patience otherwise!

So, it was the day after seeing the video. Just as any other night, we had our dinner, which is usually followed by discussions on science, technology, philosophy, current events: name it!! More often than always, there would be a confrontation or conflict of opinion, turning into a heated discussion and finally concluding with a referral to our online enchiridion: Wikipedia!! That night, I was telling my friends about this talk and how interesting it was. Out of us three, one of them is an atheist (Ranjan), the other has faith in God (Ashutosh) and I don’t have a straight answer to the question and prefer to postpone it for later. For argument sake, I could favor either of them with equal ease.

Richard Dawkins gave a wonderful definition of “atheism”. A Scientist seeks “evidence” – a signature of proof, before he could conclude any experiment or finding. I honestly don’t know the reason as to why they should be frowned upon. Around last Christmas, we had more or less the same discussion. When we asked Ashutosh as to why or how he believes in the existence of God, he answered

I can feel. It’s a feeling. I can’t help it if you have not felt it yet.

As much as it seems to me as a dysfunctional ideology of explaining, I could not help but wondering if it’s what it is. Now in the last discussion, when we asked Ranjan regarding his opinion, he replied

I am an atheist. I really have not had even a single convincing explanation regarding the existence of God. I have asked many people. They either could not answer or it was never even close to convincing.

Now, this seemed totally reasonable to me too. I would say, “This is how he FEELS”. My father has unshaken faith in God too!! When I had an argument with my mom regarding this long back, her argument was something like this.

Tell me one thing that man has CREATED that cannot be destroyed. If WE cannot do it, it’s pretty obvious to conclude that there is something more powerful than us.

I could not retaliate. I asked the same question to Ranjan. To gist it, he explained the technology where Man has implemented cloning, created mutants of bacteria (which will continue to increase in population – relatively non-destroyable). Even though it can be discredited owing to the difference between creation and invention, this made me think “Are we playing God?”

Because, Nature has thrived without us for millions of years and evolution theory claims we have been here only for about 100,000 years. So, how can we explain our extraordinary indulgence in trying to “save Nature”, say, by trying to protect the to-be-extinct species? I read in Scientific American that the animals which are expected to be extinct in the next 10 years include Camel and Crocodiles (amidst a few others). Is it really our job to preserve them? Are we underestimating Nature? Would the outcome be debilitating? Does Science really help oneself in understanding his purpose, limitations and boundaries, for we already have done passel of damages to the environment?!!

Only more questions arise. This particular topic has numerous ramifications that are intertwined. It is therefore highly impossible to stick to one particular aspect. I hope not I have swayed too much to make it appeal as a “rambling” literally! I would like to write on “Are we playing God?” in a pellucid way sooner.

because now i am confused.